After completing my first week of the MBA course at UMKC I feel it is important to take a step back and reflect on the important things I have learned. And I thought I would share them with you guys.
1. I am old! Seriously. I would estimate myself to be in the top 30% of the age bracket for the MBA program. And that is being generous to myself.
2. Hipster is in, which means I am not. Everywhere I turn there are little kids (and by little I DO mean very young) walking around in skinny jeans and tudxeo vests (which may or may not actually be hipster). I’m so unhipster that I don’t even know what classifies.
To DO
-Read 300 pages for Org Behavior
-Study up on hipster
3. The Asian population runneth over. Do you think we have a ping pong team? Perhaps I should consider concentrating my flirting efforts in this ethnic group. Smart people, good food..just sayin.
4. People get really stupid on anything with wheels. Not only do people forget how to drive a car but they also seem to forget how to ride a bike. Seriously. I nearly died when someone almost ran into me with their bike on the sidewalk. THE SIDEWALK. Side WALK. W A L K. I had an irrational urge to yell something like, “This isn’t Exchange City, yo! Ride your bike in the grass foo’!” (Just in case you aren’t as gangster as I am, foo’ is the equivalent of fool…you are welcome.) Not really sure why almost being run over by a biker makes me feel like an gangster bad ass. Regardless, I didn’t even mutter the typical Schlemiel under my breath. No gangster cursing, no Jewish insult. Not to toot my own horn but, TOOT TOOT!
5. At some point in time it became socially acceptable to wear high heels with jean shorts to your class. Stiletto high heels even. I know I’m old (see #1) and I know I went to a nerd college for undergrad, but seriously? If ever a disco ball drops down from the ceiling and Snoop comes over the stereo in one of my classes I will eat my words, but until then I will judge and judge harshly.
6. Whoever built the buildings I’m attending class in forgot what it was like to be a student. (And perhaps were never the student that left work (5 minutes later than anticipated) that needed to stop and get gas so she didn’t have to push her car, which is where she promptly and very effectively noticed she left her wallet in her desk drawer so she had to go back to work and get it and then back to the gas station which turned her previously planned leisurely drive and classroom search into a frantic road rage performance where she ran to class and was almost late and certainly out of breath…phew). All this to say: why is room 101 on the 2nd floor? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
7. On a Friday night, when one needs to read a lot, one can make that experience more palatable by putting some wine in a strawed and lidded cup (thank you for everything you do in my life QT) and turning on Criminal Minds. One could pass, oh I don’t know, approximately four hours (which translates into 4 Criminal Minds episodes) on one’s couch on a given Friday night if these conditions are met. In theory of course.
While I’m excited to continue and learn the lessons the MBA program has to bring, for now I must bid everyone a good night. My bags are packed and I’m ready for the exciting adventures of week two (where one can only hope I find non skinny jean wearing guys older than 20 to flirt outrageously with. As my friend M keeps whispering in my ear: CHRISTMAS!). Stay tuned.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
QMI for Lent 3Q
So I feel the need for confession. Lent 3Q has not jumped off to a strong start. I was doing ok. Flirting with someone every day, taking it pretty easy but making sure I got my flirt in. I’m still doing that, sorta. HOWEVER I’m failing on some major fronts. I’ve compiled a list:
1. I went to Funky Town on Friday with CP and very little flirting took place. (As a side note, it was Elvis night…try not to be too jealous). I did, however, sweat enough to fill a bathtub, but flirting was minimal. So what some of the guys were missing teeth? SO what they are as old as my dad? Discrimination is not in the SMART goals for Lent 3Q.
2. Yesterday was an epic fail. I had a headache and it didn’t go well. I flirted with nobody. Unless you count my pitiful begging of advil from a cube neighbor where I may have flirted, if you count threats of vomiting if I didn't get the headache undercontrol. Your call.
3. TODAY I felt much better and thought I would flirt like a maniac. Clearly a lie straight from the pit(s)of hell (does hell have more than one pit? Marta, shouldn’t you know this?) . One of my candidates came in this afternoon for his round of interviews. B had two things going for him that really hindered my flirtiness (besides the obvious potential coworker and current job applicant of the establishment in where I work in HR…sticky…but hey Lent supersedes interoffice policy). The first big issue that B had was some extremely odiferous cologne. One spray will do buddy, one spray will do. The second thing he had going for him that really put a damper on my flirting plan, was a complete and utter lack of respect for my personal space. He stood up to shake my hand and kept right on walking into my bubble. IT was so bad that I took a visible step back from him. I mean, he noticed. OOOOOPPPPS. I think that is the antithesis of flirting. I totally crumbled under the first sign of real pressure. Sigh.
Overall I’m going to need to step up my game. Classes start for me next week which I feel like could be my “busy season” in 3Q. Perhaps I’ll buy a cosmo and shave my legs in preparation (because isn’t that what you do or does that just mean I want to have sex?). I wonder if there is a class for flirting? I think I’ll google it.
Anyway, QMI is sad. Thankfully, tomorrow is another day. I was invited to a friend’s house tomorrow nigh (which I didn't decline, even though I need to clean and do laundry and have a book to read). So maybe I will be a big flirt there. Stay tuned. Not sure why, but I really feel as though B’s cologne served as a harbinger to “Megan Hunter’s life becomes a laughing disaster, take #3058”.
So hopefully this time next week will be good news to report. Perhaps I’ll threaten myself with some kind of repercussion if I don’t shape up. Maybe I’ll take a cue from every awesomely awful singing movie ever (cough Coyote Ugly..love that one) and sign up for amateur stripper night if I don’t get it together. Similar right?
1. I went to Funky Town on Friday with CP and very little flirting took place. (As a side note, it was Elvis night…try not to be too jealous). I did, however, sweat enough to fill a bathtub, but flirting was minimal. So what some of the guys were missing teeth? SO what they are as old as my dad? Discrimination is not in the SMART goals for Lent 3Q.
2. Yesterday was an epic fail. I had a headache and it didn’t go well. I flirted with nobody. Unless you count my pitiful begging of advil from a cube neighbor where I may have flirted, if you count threats of vomiting if I didn't get the headache undercontrol. Your call.
3. TODAY I felt much better and thought I would flirt like a maniac. Clearly a lie straight from the pit(s)of hell (does hell have more than one pit? Marta, shouldn’t you know this?) . One of my candidates came in this afternoon for his round of interviews. B had two things going for him that really hindered my flirtiness (besides the obvious potential coworker and current job applicant of the establishment in where I work in HR…sticky…but hey Lent supersedes interoffice policy). The first big issue that B had was some extremely odiferous cologne. One spray will do buddy, one spray will do. The second thing he had going for him that really put a damper on my flirting plan, was a complete and utter lack of respect for my personal space. He stood up to shake my hand and kept right on walking into my bubble. IT was so bad that I took a visible step back from him. I mean, he noticed. OOOOOPPPPS. I think that is the antithesis of flirting. I totally crumbled under the first sign of real pressure. Sigh.
Overall I’m going to need to step up my game. Classes start for me next week which I feel like could be my “busy season” in 3Q. Perhaps I’ll buy a cosmo and shave my legs in preparation (because isn’t that what you do or does that just mean I want to have sex?). I wonder if there is a class for flirting? I think I’ll google it.
Anyway, QMI is sad. Thankfully, tomorrow is another day. I was invited to a friend’s house tomorrow nigh (which I didn't decline, even though I need to clean and do laundry and have a book to read). So maybe I will be a big flirt there. Stay tuned. Not sure why, but I really feel as though B’s cologne served as a harbinger to “Megan Hunter’s life becomes a laughing disaster, take #3058”.
So hopefully this time next week will be good news to report. Perhaps I’ll threaten myself with some kind of repercussion if I don’t shape up. Maybe I’ll take a cue from every awesomely awful singing movie ever (cough Coyote Ugly..love that one) and sign up for amateur stripper night if I don’t get it together. Similar right?
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Lent...take 3.
The third tim eis a charm.
So last night I was having dinner with my friend CP and she helped me decide my new Lent. Actually she suggested I make my newest endeavor my third Lent. It can be Lent Q3 if you will…appropriate. So the new goal is to add something instead of taking something away. Previously I decided to not eat out. I did so so on that Lent.
For Lent Q3 I’m going to be adding to my daily life. I’ve decided to add (DRUM ROLL)flirting. Yep that’s right, flirting. I am going to attempt to flirt with everyone I see. Ok just kidding (sort of), but as my friend M says I’m going to, “Get my flirt on”. We will see how it goes.
I was thinking about this while lying in bed and I decided I should come up with some parameters on what I think flirting is and who should be exempt. Please see the following Flirt Rules:
1. All is fair in love and flirting except for the marrieds. This means ugly, cute, bald, snaggle tooth, and comb overs all get flirted with. Yes (and this will shock several of you) even the short guys. However, if somebody put a ring on it, they are exempt.
2. Not necessary to flirt all the time but it is necessary to flirt every day. You know what they say, “a solid flirt a day keeps the cat lady title away”. As a byproduct I had better amp up my social outings or the person in the cube next to me is going to get a lot of eye batting and giggling (and she is a 60 year old lady). Could be a problem
3. If you ask, I will go. Due to the fact that I need to get out more to participate in this Lent, I’m game to do whatever (as long as it isn’t while I’m in class or at work…mostly). I can turn no invitation down (again , as long as it doesn’t interfere with my commitments…solitude no longer counting as a commitment).
4. Wikepedia defines flirting as, “a playful, romantic or sexual overture by one person to another subtly indicating an interest in a deeper relationship with the other person, and can involve verbal communication as well as body language. I believe everything wikepedia says, so I think that I will take that definition for now. Think hair flinging, giggling, and small touches on the hand. That’s me.
5. Lastly I’m willing to be held accountable(ish). This is a change for me because usually I refuse to listen to advice on this topic. Although I always nod my head and PRETEND like I’m going to listen. Now, I’m going to try. If its suggest, I’ll give it a whirl (serious suggestions only).
This should be interesting. I’ll keep you updated on my progress. Perhaps by September 18th I will be one of those girls you have to preempt with a comment like, “oh she doesn’t mean anything by it, she is just flirty by nature”. Yeah!
So look out world. I’m on the prowl. (That last sentence was painful to type and sort of made me feel like a cougar previous to when it became popular. Or perhaps I feel more like the lady in the pleather snake skin mini skirt with red lipstick on her teeth. It’s a tossup. Either way I shan’t delete it because Lent Q3 is my first step in prevention…well maybe step 2 since I don’t own a pleather snake skin mini skirt.)
Oh also I think I’m going back to Funky Town (the place where a lady asked me to be her sex slave…que Rhianna) soon. Could be interesting.
So, on that note...Ciao(please insert hair flip and coy smile)
So last night I was having dinner with my friend CP and she helped me decide my new Lent. Actually she suggested I make my newest endeavor my third Lent. It can be Lent Q3 if you will…appropriate. So the new goal is to add something instead of taking something away. Previously I decided to not eat out. I did so so on that Lent.
For Lent Q3 I’m going to be adding to my daily life. I’ve decided to add (DRUM ROLL)flirting. Yep that’s right, flirting. I am going to attempt to flirt with everyone I see. Ok just kidding (sort of), but as my friend M says I’m going to, “Get my flirt on”. We will see how it goes.
I was thinking about this while lying in bed and I decided I should come up with some parameters on what I think flirting is and who should be exempt. Please see the following Flirt Rules:
1. All is fair in love and flirting except for the marrieds. This means ugly, cute, bald, snaggle tooth, and comb overs all get flirted with. Yes (and this will shock several of you) even the short guys. However, if somebody put a ring on it, they are exempt.
2. Not necessary to flirt all the time but it is necessary to flirt every day. You know what they say, “a solid flirt a day keeps the cat lady title away”. As a byproduct I had better amp up my social outings or the person in the cube next to me is going to get a lot of eye batting and giggling (and she is a 60 year old lady). Could be a problem
3. If you ask, I will go. Due to the fact that I need to get out more to participate in this Lent, I’m game to do whatever (as long as it isn’t while I’m in class or at work…mostly). I can turn no invitation down (again , as long as it doesn’t interfere with my commitments…solitude no longer counting as a commitment).
4. Wikepedia defines flirting as, “a playful, romantic or sexual overture by one person to another subtly indicating an interest in a deeper relationship with the other person, and can involve verbal communication as well as body language. I believe everything wikepedia says, so I think that I will take that definition for now. Think hair flinging, giggling, and small touches on the hand. That’s me.
5. Lastly I’m willing to be held accountable(ish). This is a change for me because usually I refuse to listen to advice on this topic. Although I always nod my head and PRETEND like I’m going to listen. Now, I’m going to try. If its suggest, I’ll give it a whirl (serious suggestions only).
This should be interesting. I’ll keep you updated on my progress. Perhaps by September 18th I will be one of those girls you have to preempt with a comment like, “oh she doesn’t mean anything by it, she is just flirty by nature”. Yeah!
So look out world. I’m on the prowl. (That last sentence was painful to type and sort of made me feel like a cougar previous to when it became popular. Or perhaps I feel more like the lady in the pleather snake skin mini skirt with red lipstick on her teeth. It’s a tossup. Either way I shan’t delete it because Lent Q3 is my first step in prevention…well maybe step 2 since I don’t own a pleather snake skin mini skirt.)
Oh also I think I’m going back to Funky Town (the place where a lady asked me to be her sex slave…que Rhianna) soon. Could be interesting.
So, on that note...Ciao(please insert hair flip and coy smile)
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